Golf Ipsum

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Jack Nicklaus

Ostrich Struck by lightning And your caddie gets cross. Reading the green, And good luck! Score a par While heckling your opponent.

Feeling happy now, Losing your ball in the rough, Walking over the putting green. And swing. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Score a par Tom Watson Weak grip Look out a ball is coming straight for you! You deserve a mulligan. Short irons You deserve a mulligan. Good break! While heckling your opponent, Making a lot of noise Good break! Out of frustration Fried egg Duck hook! Score a birdie Plugged lie in the bunker Carrying your clubs Begin the back nine holes, Texas Wedge Losing your ball in the rough, Start your backswing, take it slow.

Brassie You got the yips Texas Wedge While drinking beer Begin the back nine holes, Out of anger Tearing up a scorecard Look out a ball is coming straight for you! And good luck! Looking for a new angle of attack Score an albatross Pull out the driver and....

To buy a drink for And shank it. Texas Wedge Carrying your clubs Long irons Score a par Use your Lob Wedge You got the yips Texas Wedge Losing your ball in the rough, Texas Wedge Use your Lob Wedge You skied it! Cheating on the next hole.

While drinking beer While heckling your opponent, Taking a practise swing, Duck hook! Fluffy lie Swear at the Captain and get banned. Jack Nicklaus Tiger Woods Chip in Tee off Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, To distract your opponent Gary Player.