Golf Ipsum
A scratch golfer
A scratch golfer, And shank it. Aiming for the groundsman That's a big slice Pitch and run Tee off Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Chip and run Mashie To distract your opponent Use your Lob Wedge Lose your putter, forced to go home. Open stance A scratch golfer, Niblick Win the Green Jacket Jack Nicklaus Tee off For getting banned from the course. Chip and run Begin the back nine holes.
Visit the golf range, Tiger Woods Thinking your at Sunningdale Completely missed the ball, oops! Pitching Wedge A scratch golfer, Good break! A controlled draw Pitching Wedge That's a big slice Begin the back nine holes, Mind where the divot lands! Begin the front nine holes, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Top your tee shot, Pitching Wedge Spoon You need more lessons! Rub of the green.
Splash shot Shouting Fore as loud as you can. 3-iron comes out, That's a big hook At Augusta National To buy a drink for Losing your ball in the rough, While heckling your opponent, At Augusta National Out of anger Score a par While heckling your opponent, A gentle fade "Get in the hole!" Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, That's a gimme. And snap your club in half. And getting annoyed Weak grip And shank it. Taking a practise swing, Chip in Reading the green, At the Clubhouse, Get thrown off the course.
Roll around on the ground laughing, That's a gimme. Swear at the Captain and get banned. Short irons You need more lessons! Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Ben Hogan Texas Wedge Win the Green Jacket At St. Andrews, Duck hook! Pulled to the left Completely missed the ball, oops! Hole in One! Out of frustration Making a lot of noise You got the yips Pulled to the left Ben Hogan Score a par Start your backswing, take it slow. Cleek Ben Hogan Cleek Using your putter to plumb-bob, Jigger A gentle fade Your ball hits the Captain.
A controlled draw Lose your putter, forced to go home. Chip in And shank it. To buy a drink for Texas Wedge You skied it! Take a mulligan, Pulled to the left Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Open clubface While heckling your opponent, Spoon.