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Golf Ipsum

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Get a new Sand Iron

Begin the front nine holes, Better luck next time! And your caddie gets cross. Short irons Carrying your clubs A scratch golfer, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, You deserve a mulligan. Score an albatross Use your Lob Wedge Use your Lob Wedge Tearing up a scorecard Duck hook!

Time to buy some new clubs Brassie Pull out your 3-wood and.... That's a big hook Use your Lob Wedge Fried egg And swing. Run down the fairway shouting Take a mulligan, Long irons Arnold Palmer Swing quickly, Get your 5 wood For packing in golf Pitch and run Using your putter to plumb-bob, You need more lessons! Pushed to the right You need more lessons! Completely missed the ball, oops! Pull out your 3-wood and.... And your caddie gets cross. Hit it as hard as you can Get your 5 wood Carrying your clubs You deserve a mulligan. Act your age and not like a pro.

Carrying your clubs Score a bogey A controlled draw Pull out the driver and.... While drinking beer At Augusta National And getting annoyed Time to buy some new clubs Fried egg And snap your club in half. A controlled draw Roll around on the ground laughing, Score an albatross Score a double bogey.

Weak grip Open clubface Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Win the Green Jacket Tom Watson Score a double bogey Score a par Hit it as hard as you can To buy a drink for To buy a drink for 3-iron comes out, Fried egg Chip in.

Shouting Fore as loud as you can. At the Clubhouse, Score a birdie Cheating on the next hole A gentle fade Win the Green Jacket Duck hook! A scratch golfer, Hit it as hard as you can Start your backswing, take it slow. Looking for a new angle of attack Making a lot of noise Plugged lie in the bunker Tiger Woods Score an eagle Fluffy lie And good luck! Shouting Fore as loud as you can. "Get in the hole!".