Golf Ipsum
Begin the front nine holes
Pushed to the right Score a bogey Win the Green Jacket Pitching Wedge Fried egg Mashie Get a new Sand Iron Niblick Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Get your 5 wood Short irons Fluffy lie Ostrich Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Start your backswing, take it slow. Pitching Wedge Making a lot of noise Dancing on the practise ground. Arnold Palmer Lose your putter, forced to go home. At Augusta National Swear at the Captain and get banned. Losing your ball in the rough, And getting annoyed Condor Tee off Get thrown off the course And swing.
And swing. Run down the fairway shouting Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Mashie That's a gimme. Begin the front nine holes, Dancing on the practise ground. A scratch golfer, That's a gimme.
Looking for a new angle of attack And shank it. Phoenix Take a mulligan, "Get in the hole!" Steady footwork Run down the fairway shouting Tearing up a scorecard Act your age and not like a pro. A controlled draw Good break! And snap your club in half. Good rhythm Begin the back nine holes, A controlled draw Good rhythm Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Your ball hits the Captain, Out of anger Arnold Palmer And getting annoyed And lose your mind, Long irons Brassie Out of anger Taking a practise swing, Score a double bogey Out of anger.
Open clubface Tiger Woods A controlled draw Gary Player And getting annoyed Swear at the Captain and get banned. Out of frustration Visit the golf range, Lose your putter, forced to go home. A gentle fade Out of frustration Score a double bogey And your caddie gets cross. Jack Nicklaus While heckling your opponent, Act your age and not like a pro. Feeling happy now, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Get thrown off the course Mind where the divot lands! Pulled to the left Run down the fairway shouting Lose your putter, forced to go home. Ostrich Tee off The 19th Hole.
Pitching Wedge Brassie That's a floater. Score an eagle Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Dancing on the practise ground. Completely missed the ball, oops! Fried egg Waggle your hips and swing Mind where the divot lands! Out of frustration Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Arnold Palmer 3-iron comes out, Good rhythm For getting banned from the course. To buy a drink for A controlled draw Texas Wedge Pushed to the right Score an albatross And swing. Good break!