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Golf Ipsum

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Rub of the green

Run down the fairway shouting Texas Wedge And snap your club in half. Feeling happy now, Chip and run Plugged lie in the bunker To distract your opponent Chip and run Mashie Good break! And good luck!

Jack Nicklaus Score an eagle At St. Andrews, Pulled to the left Mind where the divot lands! Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Using your putter to plumb-bob, Mashie Ostrich And getting annoyed Pitch and run Dancing on the practise ground. Your ball hits the Captain, Look out a ball is coming straight for you! A scratch golfer, Out of anger.

At St. Andrews, Good break! Chip in Start your backswing, take it slow. Carrying your clubs The 19th Hole. That's a gimme. Pitch and run Jigger Jack Nicklaus To distract your opponent Pitching Wedge Waggle your hips and swing Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Tiger Woods "Get in the hole!" Swear at the Captain and get banned. Tee off Get your 5 wood Walking over the putting green. Aiming for the groundsman While drinking beer Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Phil Mickelson Out of anger Plugged lie in the bunker.

A scratch golfer, Score a par That's a big hook Struck by lightning Out of anger Better luck next time! Chip and run Mashie At Augusta National At St. Andrews, At Augusta National Spoon Reading the green, For packing in golf That's a floater. Short irons A gentle fade While heckling your opponent, Completely missed the ball, oops!

Score a bogey That's a gimme. Mind where the divot lands! Swing quickly, A controlled draw You skied it! A gentle fade And getting annoyed A gentle fade And shank it. That's a big slice.

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