Golf Ipsum

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And your caddie gets cross

"Get in the hole!" Use your Lob Wedge Thinking your at Sunningdale For getting banned from the course. Losing your ball in the rough, For getting banned from the course. Pulled to the left Out of frustration Pull out your 3-wood and.... Open clubface Niblick.

And snap your club in half. That's a gimme. Pull out the driver and.... Pulled to the left Pull out your 3-wood and.... Cheating on the next hole Plugged lie in the bunker And shank it. Start your backswing, take it slow. And lose your mind, Tearing up a scorecard Dancing on the practise ground. Tee off Arnold Palmer Score a double bogey Using your putter to plumb-bob, Using your putter to plumb-bob, Good rhythm You deserve a mulligan.

Score a birdie Niblick Waggle your hips and swing Roll around on the ground laughing, Score an eagle And lose your mind, Condor Pulled to the left A gentle fade Duck hook! Lose your putter, forced to go home. Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Using your putter to plumb-bob.

Gary Player Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Top your tee shot, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Start your backswing, take it slow. Struck by lightning Gary Player Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, While heckling your opponent, At St. Andrews, That's a big slice Score an albatross Ben Hogan Your ball hits the Captain, Good break!

That's a big slice Good rhythm Using your putter to plumb-bob, Feeling happy now, Get a new Sand Iron Fluffy lie At Augusta National Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Open clubface Hole in One! At Augusta National You skied it! Weak grip Begin the back nine holes, Open stance Feeling happy now, A scratch golfer, Making a lot of noise Jack Nicklaus Steady footwork Cleek Fluffy lie Ben Hogan Phoenix.