Golf Ipsum

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That's a gimme

Feeling happy now, Ostrich For packing in golf Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Swear at the Captain and get banned. You got the yips To distract your opponent Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Fluffy lie Pitching Wedge Better luck next time! Condor Shouting Fore as loud as you can. You need more lessons! And swing. "Get in the hole!" Waggle your hips and swing Mashie While drinking beer Reading the green.

Tearing up a scorecard Using your putter to plumb-bob, Win the Green Jacket That's a big hook Duck hook! A gentle fade To distract your opponent At St. Andrews, At Augusta National "Get in the hole!" Short irons Score a double bogey.

Hit it as hard as you can Hole in One! Act your age and not like a pro. Fluffy lie Making a lot of noise And shank it. That's a gimme. Pitching Wedge Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Out of frustration Get thrown off the course Get your 5 wood Pull out the driver and.... Fluffy lie Niblick Struck by lightning Chip in Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Oops, your ball is in the bunker.

Fluffy lie You skied it! A scratch golfer, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. A controlled draw Steady footwork Niblick Ben Hogan Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Splash shot Pushed to the right Pitch and run Pull out the driver and.... Struck by lightning.

Take a mulligan, Start your backswing, take it slow. Niblick Fried egg For packing in golf Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Ben Hogan Pitching Wedge And snap your club in half. Condor While drinking beer That's a big hook Lose your putter, forced to go home. And getting annoyed Ostrich.