Golf Ipsum

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And lose your mind

Swear at the Captain and get banned. Visit the golf range, Feeling happy now, Pull out your 3-wood and.... Pitch and run Splash shot Run down the fairway shouting To distract your opponent Dancing on the practise ground. That's a floater. Mashie And getting annoyed Texas Wedge For getting banned from the course. To buy a drink for Feeling happy now, Chip in Texas Wedge Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Get a new Sand Iron For packing in golf Jack Nicklaus And shank it. Get thrown off the course.

Win the Green Jacket Good break! Swear at the Captain and get banned. Get a new Sand Iron Aiming for the groundsman Hit it as hard as you can Phoenix Get thrown off the course Using your putter to plumb-bob, Niblick Visit the golf range.

Better luck next time! Thinking your at Sunningdale And lose your mind, At Augusta National While heckling your opponent, Take a mulligan, Good rhythm Win the Green Jacket Open stance And swing. You skied it! Weak grip.

Pitching Wedge Making a lot of noise Brassie Run down the fairway shouting Cheating on the next hole Pull out the driver and.... Mind where the divot lands! Feeling happy now, For getting banned from the course. That's a big hook Fluffy lie While drinking beer Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Carrying your clubs While heckling your opponent, Fried egg Pretend nothing just happened and smile.

Out of anger Ben Hogan Niblick Open clubface Top your tee shot, Pushed to the right And snap your club in half. Waggle your hips and swing Oops, your ball is in the bunker. A controlled draw.