Golf Ipsum

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Aiming for the groundsman

Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Losing your ball in the rough, And lose your mind, And swing. A controlled draw Take a mulligan, Struck by lightning Dancing on the practise ground. Get your 5 wood Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Splash shot Run down the fairway shouting Arnold Palmer Hole in One! Begin the front nine holes, You got the yips.

"Get in the hole!" A scratch golfer, At the Clubhouse, Top your tee shot, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Phoenix That's a big slice Dancing on the practise ground. 3-iron comes out, Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Pulled to the left Steady footwork Spoon Score an albatross And shank it. Jack Nicklaus Swear at the Captain and get banned. For packing in golf And lose your mind.

Get a new Sand Iron Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Out of frustration Score an albatross And your caddie gets cross. You skied it! At Augusta National Long irons At Augusta National Get a new Sand Iron.

Pitch and run Act your age and not like a pro. At Augusta National Hit it as hard as you can Cleek Pitch and run Fried egg Swear at the Captain and get banned. Struck by lightning Top your tee shot.

Plugged lie in the bunker Arnold Palmer A controlled draw Looking for a new angle of attack Pulled to the left Roll around on the ground laughing, Jigger And your caddie gets cross. Thinking your at Sunningdale Duck hook!