Golf Ipsum

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Score a birdie

Carrying your clubs Score an eagle 3-iron comes out, Score a birdie Visit the golf range, Struck by lightning Looking for a new angle of attack Out of anger Pitch and run Better luck next time! Tom Watson And getting annoyed Carrying your clubs "Get in the hole!" Take a mulligan, Cleek Cleek Start your backswing, take it slow. Score a bogey Spoon Get your 5 wood Pitching Wedge Condor.

Mashie Open clubface While heckling your opponent, That's a gimme. And your caddie gets cross. Pushed to the right.

Good break! Tiger Woods Ostrich Score a birdie Gary Player Phil Mickelson And your caddie gets cross. Jack Nicklaus For getting banned from the course. Phil Mickelson Jigger Score an eagle Making a lot of noise Swear at the Captain and get banned. And lose your mind, And good luck! Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Score an albatross Tearing up a scorecard Fried egg Pull out the driver and.... While drinking beer.

Thinking your at Sunningdale Aiming for the groundsman Carrying your clubs At St. Andrews, 3-iron comes out, Get thrown off the course At Augusta National A scratch golfer, Win the Green Jacket And good luck! Your ball hits the Captain, Act your age and not like a pro. You got the yips Out of anger And good luck! Score a birdie Condor Lose your putter, forced to go home. To distract your opponent And getting annoyed Run down the fairway shouting That's a floater.

For getting banned from the course. Mind where the divot lands! Phoenix That's a big slice Tom Watson For packing in golf For getting banned from the course. Pitching Wedge Feeling happy now, That's a gimme. Cleek Pitch and run Ostrich Hit it as hard as you can Pitching Wedge Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Out of frustration While heckling your opponent, Fried egg.