Golf Ipsum

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Rub of the green

A controlled draw Top your tee shot, Good break! That's a floater. Dancing on the practise ground. Dancing on the practise ground. At the Clubhouse, Chip and run Swear at the Captain and get banned. Rub of the green Time to buy some new clubs Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Mashie Out of frustration Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Walking over the putting green. Duck hook! Looking for a new angle of attack Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Tee off Weak grip A scratch golfer, And swing. Pull out your 3-wood and.... Run down the fairway shouting Pretend nothing just happened and smile.

Making a lot of noise Pulled to the left Score a double bogey Get thrown off the course Good break! At the Clubhouse, Swing quickly.

Short irons Hit it as hard as you can Open clubface A scratch golfer, Arnold Palmer Using your putter to plumb-bob, And getting annoyed That's a big hook Duck hook! And swing.

Lose your putter, forced to go home. Out of frustration Score an albatross At the Clubhouse, Pitching Wedge A scratch golfer.

While heckling your opponent, Tee off Roll around on the ground laughing, And swing. Texas Wedge To buy a drink for Open stance Losing your ball in the rough, Thinking your at Sunningdale Arnold Palmer At St. Andrews, For getting banned from the course. Tiger Woods Walking over the putting green. And swing. Losing your ball in the rough, A controlled draw Long irons.