Golf Ipsum

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Phoenix

Better luck next time! Waggle your hips and swing Condor Texas Wedge Cheating on the next hole Win the Green Jacket To buy a drink for You got the yips Walking over the putting green. While heckling your opponent, Aiming for the groundsman Begin the back nine holes, Pull out your 3-wood and.... Your ball hits the Captain.

That's a floater. A controlled draw Jigger Good break! Plugged lie in the bunker You deserve a mulligan. And swing.

That's a gimme. Walking over the putting green. Pitching Wedge Struck by lightning Jigger You got the yips At the Clubhouse, Fried egg Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, For getting banned from the course. That's a gimme. Win the Green Jacket A controlled draw Phoenix Out of frustration Run down the fairway shouting Score an eagle Pulled to the left Pitch and run While drinking beer That's a big slice Open clubface Short irons Cheating on the next hole.

Plugged lie in the bunker And getting annoyed Jack Nicklaus Losing your ball in the rough, Long irons Niblick Better luck next time! Losing your ball in the rough, You got the yips Struck by lightning "Get in the hole!" Mind where the divot lands! Your ball hits the Captain, Brassie Pulled to the left Rub of the green Using your putter to plumb-bob, Tearing up a scorecard Score a birdie And swing. Out of anger A controlled draw Swear at the Captain and get banned. Take a mulligan, And your caddie gets cross. A scratch golfer, Carrying your clubs For packing in golf A controlled draw.

Niblick Score an albatross Lose your putter, forced to go home. Gary Player Steady footwork Take a mulligan, Cleek.