Golf Ipsum

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Run down the fairway shouting

Oops, your ball is in the bunker. That's a floater. Ostrich Roll around on the ground laughing, And good luck! Get a new Sand Iron Use your Lob Wedge Pitching Wedge Completely missed the ball, oops! A controlled draw A gentle fade.

Hit it as hard as you can Feeling happy now, Good break! Making a lot of noise Mashie Duck hook! Get your 5 wood Good rhythm For getting banned from the course. Pushed to the right Pull out the driver and.... And your caddie gets cross. And good luck! Long irons "Get in the hole!" Ben Hogan Cleek Hole in One! Score a birdie Use your Lob Wedge Get thrown off the course Arnold Palmer Walking over the putting green. Begin the front nine holes, A controlled draw That's a big slice Get a new Sand Iron Jigger Phil Mickelson.

A gentle fade Long irons Phoenix At the Clubhouse, Begin the front nine holes, Plugged lie in the bunker Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, And swing. And swing. You skied it! Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Use your Lob Wedge Get your 5 wood Take a mulligan, Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Swear at the Captain and get banned. Score a birdie Weak grip And shank it. A scratch golfer, Act your age and not like a pro. And swing. Walking over the putting green. And good luck! At the Clubhouse.

Swing quickly, Short irons Use your Lob Wedge And your caddie gets cross. Niblick That's a big hook A gentle fade Top your tee shot, Score a double bogey Lose your putter, forced to go home. Short irons While drinking beer.

Hit it as hard as you can Act your age and not like a pro. Losing your ball in the rough, Brassie Good break! You deserve a mulligan. Open clubface Cheating on the next hole Struck by lightning Act your age and not like a pro. Good break! Begin the front nine holes.