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Golf Ipsum

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Walking over the putting green

Tom Watson You need more lessons! Pulled to the left Swear at the Captain and get banned. That's a floater. Pulled to the left Tom Watson Tiger Woods And snap your club in half. Swing quickly, A controlled draw Feeling happy now, Weak grip Spoon Aiming for the groundsman Swing quickly, Arnold Palmer Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Pitching Wedge Waggle your hips and swing Short irons Walking over the putting green. Score a par Run down the fairway shouting.

Reading the green, And shank it. Open clubface Ostrich Your ball hits the Captain, 3-iron comes out, For packing in golf Act your age and not like a pro. For getting banned from the course. Taking a practise swing, Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Niblick Score a double bogey "Get in the hole!" 3-iron comes out, Phil Mickelson Jack Nicklaus And good luck!

Score a birdie And swing. And getting annoyed Spoon Your ball hits the Captain, Begin the back nine holes, Reading the green, Fried egg Splash shot Duck hook! Struck by lightning Splash shot Spoon Cheating on the next hole Ostrich Get thrown off the course Open clubface And shank it. Start your backswing, take it slow. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Score a par Start your backswing, take it slow. A scratch golfer, Score a double bogey Good break! Roll around on the ground laughing, At Augusta National "Get in the hole!" For packing in golf.

Tearing up a scorecard Open clubface Weak grip Pitching Wedge "Get in the hole!" The 19th Hole. That's a big hook Short irons That's a big slice Pushed to the right Jack Nicklaus Chip in Oops, your ball is in the bunker. For getting banned from the course. And good luck! Hit it as hard as you can Visit the golf range, A scratch golfer, Walking over the putting green. Hole in One! Hole in One! And shank it. That's a big hook.

Score an eagle At St. Andrews, You deserve a mulligan. While drinking beer Lose your putter, forced to go home. Act your age and not like a pro. You got the yips Hit it as hard as you can Tom Watson Take a mulligan, At the Clubhouse, Pitch and run Rub of the green Carrying your clubs Losing your ball in the rough, Score an eagle Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Ostrich Phil Mickelson Short irons Completely missed the ball, oops! At Augusta National At Augusta National.