Golf Ipsum
Mind where the divot lands!
Jack Nicklaus Dancing on the practise ground. Carrying your clubs You skied it! Fried egg And getting annoyed Pitch and run Aiming for the groundsman Pushed to the right At St. Andrews, That's a big slice While heckling your opponent, Good break! Cheating on the next hole Use your Lob Wedge You deserve a mulligan. Niblick That's a gimme. Condor Aiming for the groundsman Score a par Chip in.
Plugged lie in the bunker Begin the front nine holes, Splash shot For getting banned from the course. Waggle your hips and swing Gary Player Good break! To buy a drink for You got the yips Score a bogey Hole in One! Cleek Waggle your hips and swing Hit it as hard as you can Better luck next time! Pull out the driver and.... Completely missed the ball, oops! Begin the back nine holes.
And shank it. Get thrown off the course Score an eagle Brassie Arnold Palmer At St. Andrews, Struck by lightning Ben Hogan Plugged lie in the bunker Pushed to the right Your ball hits the Captain, Tee off Swear at the Captain and get banned. Using your putter to plumb-bob, Tom Watson Get a new Sand Iron A gentle fade To buy a drink for To distract your opponent Time to buy some new clubs You skied it! A gentle fade Begin the front nine holes, Run down the fairway shouting Pretend nothing just happened and smile. That's a big hook To distract your opponent.
Hit it as hard as you can Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Weak grip Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Hole in One! Pitch and run Completely missed the ball, oops! Use your Lob Wedge Score an eagle For getting banned from the course. Score an eagle Act your age and not like a pro. Waggle your hips and swing Splash shot Out of frustration A controlled draw Take a mulligan, Better luck next time! That's a big slice And shank it. Mashie Texas Wedge Take a mulligan, You need more lessons! For packing in golf Get a new Sand Iron Short irons Tiger Woods.
3-iron comes out, Making a lot of noise Mashie To buy a drink for Good rhythm Gary Player That's a big slice Brassie Time to buy some new clubs Run down the fairway shouting.