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Golf Ipsum

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Act your age and not like a pro

Struck by lightning Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Out of anger Steady footwork Condor Top your tee shot, Feeling happy now, Win the Green Jacket Good rhythm.

Use your Lob Wedge Tom Watson And swing. Waggle your hips and swing Tom Watson Waggle your hips and swing Looking for a new angle of attack Tiger Woods Jack Nicklaus Phoenix Phoenix Tee off Begin the front nine holes, Fried egg Out of frustration To buy a drink for Out of anger Win the Green Jacket Making a lot of noise Score a birdie Phil Mickelson Aiming for the groundsman Pull out your 3-wood and.... Take a mulligan, Weak grip Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Score a par.

Tiger Woods Score a par And snap your club in half. Swear at the Captain and get banned. And shank it. Get a new Sand Iron For getting banned from the course. A scratch golfer, A scratch golfer, Score a par Swear at the Captain and get banned. Score a bogey At St. Andrews, Phil Mickelson Splash shot You need more lessons! And getting annoyed A controlled draw Short irons Lose your putter, forced to go home. Begin the front nine holes, Jigger Pull out the driver and.... Mind where the divot lands! Mashie A gentle fade Score a birdie Better luck next time!

You deserve a mulligan. A gentle fade Open clubface And your caddie gets cross. At the Clubhouse, Out of anger Score an eagle Phil Mickelson Score a par That's a big hook While drinking beer At the Clubhouse, Start your backswing, take it slow. Begin the front nine holes, That's a floater. Tearing up a scorecard You need more lessons! And lose your mind, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Swing quickly, Fluffy lie Feeling happy now, Walking over the putting green. And getting annoyed Pull out the driver and....

At Augusta National Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Time to buy some new clubs And good luck! Feeling happy now, Completely missed the ball, oops! Get a new Sand Iron You skied it! Out of anger Dancing on the practise ground. Pitch and run Struck by lightning That's a gimme. Hit it as hard as you can Carrying your clubs Gary Player That's a gimme. And swing. Fluffy lie 3-iron comes out, Start your backswing, take it slow. Completely missed the ball, oops!




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