Golf Ipsum

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Score an albatross

Score a bogey Carrying your clubs And good luck! Open stance That's a big slice You deserve a mulligan. Looking for a new angle of attack Pull out your 3-wood and.... Take a mulligan, Duck hook! A gentle fade And lose your mind, Tiger Woods Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Swear at the Captain and get banned. Phil Mickelson Texas Wedge Phoenix Take a mulligan, At St. Andrews, Open clubface Thinking your at Sunningdale And snap your club in half. Get your 5 wood Reading the green, Better luck next time! Get thrown off the course Run down the fairway shouting.

You skied it! Steady footwork Losing your ball in the rough, Tom Watson And snap your club in half. Fluffy lie Tiger Woods 3-iron comes out, Taking a practise swing.

Phoenix Short irons At Augusta National Score a birdie At St. Andrews, Good rhythm Reading the green, And getting annoyed That's a big hook Gary Player Win the Green Jacket.

Win the Green Jacket Phil Mickelson Dancing on the practise ground. Short irons Making a lot of noise That's a big slice That's a big slice Top your tee shot, Brassie Score a bogey Chip and run Completely missed the ball, oops! Tom Watson You need more lessons! Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Duck hook!

Phil Mickelson Niblick And shank it. A controlled draw Weak grip Condor And shank it. Hit it as hard as you can.