Golf Ipsum
Begin the back nine holes
Open clubface That's a floater. Taking a practise swing, Pitch and run Looking for a new angle of attack Visit the golf range, Losing your ball in the rough, Top your tee shot, Out of frustration A scratch golfer, Hit it as hard as you can Your ball hits the Captain, Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Score a par Taking a practise swing, Pull out your 3-wood and.... Score a double bogey Brassie And snap your club in half. "Get in the hole!" Jigger Cleek.
Score a double bogey Mind where the divot lands! Get thrown off the course Better luck next time! Act your age and not like a pro. Swear at the Captain and get banned. You skied it! Pull out your 3-wood and.... Chip in "Get in the hole!" Walking over the putting green. Reading the green, And lose your mind, Score a double bogey Take a mulligan.
You skied it! Pushed to the right That's a big hook Score a par Taking a practise swing, At Augusta National At Augusta National Open clubface Out of frustration Jack Nicklaus Tee off A gentle fade Open stance At the Clubhouse, Top your tee shot.
Niblick Run down the fairway shouting That's a floater. Tearing up a scorecard Out of anger You need more lessons! To distract your opponent "Get in the hole!" Good break! Pull out your 3-wood and.... Score a birdie While heckling your opponent, Get your 5 wood Long irons And your caddie gets cross. That's a big slice Dancing on the practise ground. Good rhythm Phil Mickelson Time to buy some new clubs "Get in the hole!" Splash shot Out of anger Phil Mickelson Score a double bogey Cleek.
Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Looking for a new angle of attack Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, For getting banned from the course. At Augusta National That's a floater. Swear at the Captain and get banned. Hit it as hard as you can Looking for a new angle of attack Spoon You deserve a mulligan. Waggle your hips and swing And snap your club in half. Brassie To buy a drink for Tee off Begin the front nine holes, For packing in golf.