Golf Ipsum

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Short irons

At St. Andrews, Hit it as hard as you can Pull out your 3-wood and.... You deserve a mulligan. Taking a practise swing, Score a birdie Feeling happy now, Visit the golf range, Get a new Sand Iron Open clubface And your caddie gets cross. Score a double bogey Tearing up a scorecard Ben Hogan Long irons Score a double bogey Score a bogey Tearing up a scorecard Pitch and run Begin the front nine holes, 3-iron comes out, Out of frustration Aiming for the groundsman You got the yips Swear at the Captain and get banned.

Struck by lightning Get a new Sand Iron For getting banned from the course. Pitch and run Aiming for the groundsman Making a lot of noise.

That's a big hook Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Out of anger At Augusta National Score a double bogey You skied it! Tearing up a scorecard Score a birdie Pitching Wedge Fluffy lie Mind where the divot lands! To distract your opponent Get a new Sand Iron Dancing on the practise ground. Struck by lightning Jack Nicklaus Splash shot Visit the golf range, Using your putter to plumb-bob, The 19th Hole. At the Clubhouse.

And lose your mind, Win the Green Jacket Open clubface Gary Player Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Waggle your hips and swing Using your putter to plumb-bob, Condor Begin the back nine holes, Open stance Swear at the Captain and get banned. Jigger Plugged lie in the bunker Long irons Tee off Score a double bogey That's a floater. Arnold Palmer Weak grip Use your Lob Wedge The 19th Hole. Tee off Condor Feeling happy now.

Duck hook! Mashie Score a double bogey Swear at the Captain and get banned. And good luck! Swing quickly, Out of frustration Fried egg Score a birdie Looking for a new angle of attack Spoon Looking for a new angle of attack.