Golf Ipsum

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Lose your putter, forced to go home

That's a gimme. Get thrown off the course Lose your putter, forced to go home. Hole in One! Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Score a par Time to buy some new clubs Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Tee off You need more lessons! Score a double bogey Win the Green Jacket Short irons Tom Watson Long irons Plugged lie in the bunker Phil Mickelson And good luck! Hit it as hard as you can That's a floater.

That's a big hook Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Start your backswing, take it slow. That's a floater. Pushed to the right Tearing up a scorecard Feeling happy now, Tee off.

Reading the green, Weak grip Cleek Splash shot Chip and run Open stance Jigger Jigger Hit it as hard as you can To buy a drink for Condor That's a big slice Tiger Woods The 19th Hole. Tiger Woods Tom Watson.

That's a big slice Swear at the Captain and get banned. Brassie Phil Mickelson Using your putter to plumb-bob, Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Mind where the divot lands! You got the yips.

Tee off Roll around on the ground laughing, Mind where the divot lands! You got the yips Time to buy some new clubs Chip and run Score a bogey Steady footwork Lose your putter, forced to go home. Pull out the driver and....