Golf Ipsum

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Weak grip

Ben Hogan Phoenix That's a big hook Score a bogey Open clubface Fluffy lie Weak grip That's a big slice Splash shot Pull out the driver and.... Get a new Sand Iron Taking a practise swing, You deserve a mulligan. That's a big slice Roll around on the ground laughing, To buy a drink for Swear at the Captain and get banned.

A controlled draw Swear at the Captain and get banned. Duck hook! Take a mulligan, Tearing up a scorecard "Get in the hole!" Looking for a new angle of attack Fried egg And your caddie gets cross. Get a new Sand Iron Swing quickly, To distract your opponent Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Score a bogey Cheating on the next hole Taking a practise swing, Jack Nicklaus To distract your opponent That's a big hook That's a gimme. Out of frustration.

Pitch and run Cleek Weak grip Win the Green Jacket Completely missed the ball, oops! You need more lessons! Cheating on the next hole Pitching Wedge Begin the back nine holes, Using your putter to plumb-bob, And lose your mind, Rub of the green.

At Augusta National Aiming for the groundsman Thinking your at Sunningdale Use your Lob Wedge Run down the fairway shouting You skied it! Good rhythm Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Act your age and not like a pro. Get thrown off the course To distract your opponent Chip in To buy a drink for Weak grip Begin the back nine holes, And lose your mind, And getting annoyed Rub of the green Out of anger Top your tee shot, Tearing up a scorecard Taking a practise swing, Short irons At Augusta National Phoenix Chip and run Completely missed the ball, oops! Steady footwork.

Score a bogey To distract your opponent Phil Mickelson Score an eagle Pull out your 3-wood and.... And swing. That's a floater. Niblick Score a bogey Take a mulligan, Tiger Woods At St. Andrews, Aiming for the groundsman Your ball hits the Captain, Lose your putter, forced to go home. Take a mulligan, A gentle fade The 19th Hole. Splash shot Score a double bogey Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Rub of the green And snap your club in half. Take a mulligan, And getting annoyed.