Golf Ipsum

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Waggle your hips and swing

And swing. Pitch and run You got the yips Run down the fairway shouting Get thrown off the course Phil Mickelson Mind where the divot lands! Ostrich Short irons And good luck! And shank it. Plugged lie in the bunker Hole in One! At Augusta National Tom Watson Chip in Swear at the Captain and get banned. Score a bogey Chip and run Score an albatross Long irons Open stance "Get in the hole!" Gary Player Pull out your 3-wood and.... Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Tee off Rub of the green You need more lessons!

Act your age and not like a pro. Better luck next time! Start your backswing, take it slow. And snap your club in half. Visit the golf range, Ostrich Spoon Spoon Gary Player.

Start your backswing, take it slow. Good break! Tom Watson Oops, your ball is in the bunker. And snap your club in half. Losing your ball in the rough, Ben Hogan Fried egg Get thrown off the course.

Cleek Weak grip Tee off Looking for a new angle of attack Aiming for the groundsman Score a double bogey Struck by lightning Lose your putter, forced to go home. Aiming for the groundsman Using your putter to plumb-bob, Score a par Out of anger Weak grip Win the Green Jacket Chip in Gary Player A gentle fade And snap your club in half. Mind where the divot lands! At St. Andrews, A scratch golfer.

That's a floater. That's a floater. Swing quickly, Rub of the green Pulled to the left Jigger Hit it as hard as you can.