Golf Ipsum

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Out of anger

Get a new Sand Iron Thinking your at Sunningdale Time to buy some new clubs Lose your putter, forced to go home. Spoon That's a gimme. Spoon "Get in the hole!" Time to buy some new clubs While heckling your opponent, Thinking your at Sunningdale Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, You got the yips Pulled to the left That's a big hook.

At the Clubhouse, The 19th Hole. Plugged lie in the bunker Spoon Dancing on the practise ground. While drinking beer Pull out the driver and.... For getting banned from the course. Condor And shank it. Looking for a new angle of attack Long irons Fried egg For packing in golf Phil Mickelson Phoenix Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Pitching Wedge Pitch and run Gary Player Tearing up a scorecard You got the yips Thinking your at Sunningdale Losing your ball in the rough, Act your age and not like a pro.

Open clubface Use your Lob Wedge Waggle your hips and swing Score an albatross Jigger To distract your opponent Tom Watson Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Texas Wedge Carrying your clubs Struck by lightning Out of anger Pull out your 3-wood and.... Score a double bogey Plugged lie in the bunker You skied it! Pulled to the left.

You got the yips And swing. Start your backswing, take it slow. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Time to buy some new clubs Score a par Begin the back nine holes, The 19th Hole.

Better luck next time! And snap your club in half. Pull out the driver and.... And swing. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Out of frustration "Get in the hole!" Hit it as hard as you can Swing quickly.