Golf Ipsum

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Score a birdie

Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Hole in One! Chip in Score a birdie Mind where the divot lands! Act your age and not like a pro. Better luck next time! Pull out your 3-wood and.... Pull out the driver and....

The 19th Hole. Begin the back nine holes, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Begin the back nine holes, Thinking your at Sunningdale Roll around on the ground laughing, Struck by lightning Shouting Fore as loud as you can. "Get in the hole!" Act your age and not like a pro. While heckling your opponent, Chip in Begin the back nine holes, Lose your putter, forced to go home. Carrying your clubs You got the yips Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Score a double bogey Steady footwork Hit it as hard as you can And shank it. Ostrich At Augusta National And snap your club in half. Splash shot.

Steady footwork While drinking beer And good luck! 3-iron comes out, You need more lessons! Making a lot of noise Tom Watson Thinking your at Sunningdale Time to buy some new clubs Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Completely missed the ball, oops! Score a double bogey.

Plugged lie in the bunker Using your putter to plumb-bob, A gentle fade You got the yips Mind where the divot lands! Splash shot Top your tee shot, Splash shot You need more lessons! Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Cleek Ostrich Losing your ball in the rough, Swing quickly, Fluffy lie Texas Wedge Tom Watson That's a big hook Thinking your at Sunningdale.

Get thrown off the course Chip and run Splash shot Waggle your hips and swing "Get in the hole!" Waggle your hips and swing Visit the golf range, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Pull out your 3-wood and....