Golf Ipsum
Run down the fairway shouting
Struck by lightning Pitch and run Jigger Out of frustration That's a floater. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Using your putter to plumb-bob, At the Clubhouse, Steady footwork Pitch and run To buy a drink for Ostrich Fluffy lie Plugged lie in the bunker You got the yips Spoon Lose your putter, forced to go home. Losing your ball in the rough, And your caddie gets cross.
Taking a practise swing, Open clubface Act your age and not like a pro. Begin the back nine holes, That's a big slice Pushed to the right Phoenix Open stance Tom Watson Begin the front nine holes, And snap your club in half. "Get in the hole!" Begin the back nine holes, Good rhythm Phil Mickelson Reading the green, Long irons Steady footwork That's a gimme. Reading the green, Lose your putter, forced to go home. Good break! Walking over the putting green. Run down the fairway shouting Good break!
Visit the golf range, Open stance Your ball hits the Captain, Splash shot Ostrich Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Pitching Wedge Dancing on the practise ground. Hole in One! Short irons Your ball hits the Captain, Mashie Ben Hogan Win the Green Jacket That's a big slice Weak grip That's a gimme. A scratch golfer, Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Get your 5 wood Carrying your clubs Gary Player At the Clubhouse, At St. Andrews, That's a big hook Brassie Cleek Time to buy some new clubs.
And swing. Begin the front nine holes, That's a big hook Struck by lightning Pushed to the right Pitching Wedge Pitching Wedge You skied it! Swing quickly, To distract your opponent Feeling happy now, To buy a drink for Looking for a new angle of attack Dancing on the practise ground. Score a bogey A controlled draw Phil Mickelson Ben Hogan Good break! That's a big slice.
For getting banned from the course. That's a big hook Mashie And shank it. Mind where the divot lands! Losing your ball in the rough.