Golf Ipsum

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Time to buy some new clubs

While drinking beer You deserve a mulligan. A controlled draw A controlled draw Phil Mickelson Pretend nothing just happened and smile. The 19th Hole. Score a birdie Good break! At St. Andrews, A gentle fade Hole in One! Reading the green, And shank it. Mind where the divot lands! Swing quickly, Chip in Splash shot.

Splash shot Rub of the green For getting banned from the course. Mind where the divot lands! Pitch and run A controlled draw Looking for a new angle of attack Condor.

Pull out the driver and.... A gentle fade Better luck next time! And lose your mind, Score a par Texas Wedge Rub of the green At Augusta National Out of frustration Condor Thinking your at Sunningdale A scratch golfer, That's a gimme. Open stance Get a new Sand Iron A gentle fade That's a gimme. A scratch golfer, Open stance While drinking beer Win the Green Jacket Get thrown off the course.

Waggle your hips and swing And your caddie gets cross. Dancing on the practise ground. Tee off Pushed to the right Score an eagle Tee off And good luck! Making a lot of noise Fried egg Tee off Pull out the driver and.... At Augusta National That's a floater. You deserve a mulligan. Losing your ball in the rough, Score a birdie Looking for a new angle of attack The 19th Hole. Pull out your 3-wood and.... Fried egg Pitching Wedge And snap your club in half. Score a par At Augusta National You need more lessons!

Open clubface Completely missed the ball, oops! And your caddie gets cross. Jigger And lose your mind, Fluffy lie That's a big slice That's a big slice Making a lot of noise Get a new Sand Iron Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Chip in Out of frustration And shank it. Phil Mickelson Open stance Chip in Tom Watson Feeling happy now, Reading the green, Completely missed the ball, oops! And shank it. Steady footwork Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Losing your ball in the rough, While heckling your opponent.