Golf Ipsum

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Score a double bogey

You got the yips Visit the golf range, At the Clubhouse, Taking a practise swing, Get a new Sand Iron Jigger Act your age and not like a pro. Tearing up a scorecard Pitch and run Struck by lightning Open clubface Gary Player Begin the back nine holes, Mind where the divot lands! And your caddie gets cross. And snap your club in half. Out of frustration And snap your club in half. Condor Use your Lob Wedge Score a birdie Carrying your clubs Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Win the Green Jacket Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, And getting annoyed While heckling your opponent, A controlled draw.

Act your age and not like a pro. Pushed to the right Mashie Visit the golf range, Dancing on the practise ground. Get thrown off the course Score an albatross Mind where the divot lands! Score an eagle Struck by lightning Hit it as hard as you can Score a double bogey Weak grip A scratch golfer, Niblick Cheating on the next hole Brassie Good rhythm.

Aiming for the groundsman At St. Andrews, You deserve a mulligan. Duck hook! Get your 5 wood To buy a drink for Pitch and run Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Making a lot of noise Tiger Woods Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Dancing on the practise ground. While drinking beer Steady footwork Hole in One! Pushed to the right Steady footwork Long irons Out of anger 3-iron comes out, Phil Mickelson Begin the back nine holes, Open clubface.

Good break! Time to buy some new clubs Thinking your at Sunningdale Making a lot of noise Score an albatross You need more lessons! Jack Nicklaus Tiger Woods And swing. Short irons Spoon At Augusta National And swing. Gary Player.

And your caddie gets cross. Phoenix Reading the green, Mashie Pitching Wedge While heckling your opponent, Texas Wedge Run down the fairway shouting And shank it. Making a lot of noise Use your Lob Wedge Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Begin the back nine holes, Pitching Wedge Hole in One! Cleek Thinking your at Sunningdale Pitch and run Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Time to buy some new clubs And swing. Score a double bogey.