Golf Ipsum

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Get a new Sand Iron

Pitching Wedge Long irons Begin the back nine holes, A gentle fade Using your putter to plumb-bob, Fried egg Walking over the putting green. Brassie Take a mulligan, 3-iron comes out, Top your tee shot, Walking over the putting green. Tiger Woods Cleek Weak grip Mashie A controlled draw Pitch and run Reading the green, Fluffy lie Tom Watson And swing. Ostrich Hit it as hard as you can At the Clubhouse, Tearing up a scorecard At the Clubhouse.

And shank it. And getting annoyed Carrying your clubs Swear at the Captain and get banned. Time to buy some new clubs Score a double bogey Score a birdie Lose your putter, forced to go home. Long irons And your caddie gets cross. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, You got the yips And snap your club in half. Top your tee shot, Start your backswing, take it slow. Phil Mickelson You skied it! Tom Watson Jack Nicklaus Cheating on the next hole.

Tearing up a scorecard Losing your ball in the rough, Open clubface Out of anger Pitch and run Thinking your at Sunningdale Pull out your 3-wood and.... Ostrich Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Score an albatross And shank it. Tee off At St. Andrews, You got the yips And your caddie gets cross. Phil Mickelson.

3-iron comes out, Get a new Sand Iron And your caddie gets cross. Looking for a new angle of attack Act your age and not like a pro. Score an eagle Score a bogey Score a bogey Time to buy some new clubs And your caddie gets cross. Thinking your at Sunningdale Your ball hits the Captain, Get your 5 wood Taking a practise swing, Top your tee shot, Walking over the putting green. At St. Andrews, Duck hook! Act your age and not like a pro. Score a double bogey Jack Nicklaus.

Spoon A controlled draw Score a bogey At the Clubhouse, Feeling happy now, Shouting Fore as loud as you can. "Get in the hole!" Splash shot Plugged lie in the bunker Look out a ball is coming straight for you! "Get in the hole!".