Golf Ipsum

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Start your backswing, take it slow

Making a lot of noise Top your tee shot, Completely missed the ball, oops! Lose your putter, forced to go home. Score a birdie Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Losing your ball in the rough, Ben Hogan That's a floater. Pull out your 3-wood and.... Looking for a new angle of attack Swear at the Captain and get banned. Your ball hits the Captain, Duck hook! Hit it as hard as you can Fluffy lie Act your age and not like a pro. Struck by lightning Jigger.

Better luck next time! Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, A controlled draw To distract your opponent Score an albatross Making a lot of noise Phoenix Better luck next time! Mind where the divot lands! You deserve a mulligan.

Texas Wedge Chip and run Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Fluffy lie Visit the golf range, Chip and run For getting banned from the course. Duck hook! Out of anger Arnold Palmer Steady footwork Begin the back nine holes, Spoon Open stance Win the Green Jacket Pull out your 3-wood and.... A controlled draw And lose your mind, Open clubface And your caddie gets cross. 3-iron comes out, Steady footwork Pull out the driver and.... Carrying your clubs That's a gimme. Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, And swing.

"Get in the hole!" Get a new Sand Iron Top your tee shot, And getting annoyed Good break! Ostrich Splash shot Feeling happy now, Open clubface Fried egg Pitch and run A controlled draw Jigger.

Pulled to the left Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Tom Watson At Augusta National Chip and run Pull out the driver and.... Steady footwork Shouting Fore as loud as you can.