Golf Ipsum

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"Get in the hole!"

Plugged lie in the bunker Get your 5 wood Use your Lob Wedge You deserve a mulligan. Niblick Pitching Wedge Mashie.

Swear at the Captain and get banned. The 19th Hole. Tiger Woods And snap your club in half. And your caddie gets cross. Ostrich.

Chip in Run down the fairway shouting Roll around on the ground laughing, Chip and run Better luck next time!

Tiger Woods Begin the back nine holes, Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Aiming for the groundsman Gary Player Swear at the Captain and get banned. Texas Wedge While drinking beer And getting annoyed Score an albatross That's a big hook Better luck next time! Time to buy some new clubs Short irons And lose your mind, Taking a practise swing, Top your tee shot, Waggle your hips and swing Texas Wedge Fried egg Condor.

Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Pushed to the right While heckling your opponent, The 19th Hole. Visit the golf range, Hit it as hard as you can That's a big slice Take a mulligan, For getting banned from the course. 3-iron comes out, Dancing on the practise ground. Act your age and not like a pro. Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker.