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Golf Ipsum

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Waggle your hips and swing

Score an albatross While heckling your opponent, Score a double bogey Gary Player A controlled draw Chip and run Roll around on the ground laughing, 3-iron comes out, Win the Green Jacket Score a bogey Aiming for the groundsman Start your backswing, take it slow. Swing quickly, And getting annoyed For packing in golf Thinking your at Sunningdale Texas Wedge To distract your opponent Spoon Plugged lie in the bunker Score an albatross That's a big hook Your ball hits the Captain, Mashie Chip and run A controlled draw Pushed to the right.

Fried egg Top your tee shot, Making a lot of noise Win the Green Jacket And snap your club in half. Out of frustration Long irons And snap your club in half. Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Mind where the divot lands! Chip in Visit the golf range, Cleek A scratch golfer, Run down the fairway shouting Niblick Time to buy some new clubs Chip and run At Augusta National Reading the green, At St. Andrews.

Out of anger Start your backswing, take it slow. Brassie Chip and run Using your putter to plumb-bob, Start your backswing, take it slow. Pulled to the left Your ball hits the Captain, Pulled to the left Struck by lightning Rub of the green.

Cleek Aiming for the groundsman Tom Watson Reading the green, Using your putter to plumb-bob, Lose your putter, forced to go home. Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Jack Nicklaus Out of frustration Jack Nicklaus Texas Wedge And swing. "Get in the hole!".

Swing quickly, Tearing up a scorecard Brassie For packing in golf Score an albatross Tom Watson Ben Hogan Open clubface Use your Lob Wedge Hole in One! Out of frustration Get thrown off the course Duck hook! You deserve a mulligan.