Golf Ipsum

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Walking over the putting green

Brassie Phil Mickelson Get thrown off the course Visit the golf range, Jigger Phoenix Get your 5 wood At the Clubhouse, And swing. Mind where the divot lands! Mind where the divot lands!

To buy a drink for You skied it! A gentle fade For getting banned from the course. Tiger Woods Get thrown off the course Open stance That's a big hook Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Long irons And snap your club in half. You need more lessons! Hit it as hard as you can Waggle your hips and swing And swing. Using your putter to plumb-bob, Get thrown off the course.

To buy a drink for And swing. Tiger Woods Splash shot Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Phoenix Swing quickly, Looking for a new angle of attack And getting annoyed A gentle fade Out of frustration Get a new Sand Iron Use your Lob Wedge Walking over the putting green. Chip in Run down the fairway shouting Roll around on the ground laughing, Plugged lie in the bunker Struck by lightning Dancing on the practise ground. Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Your ball hits the Captain, To distract your opponent At St. Andrews, To buy a drink for.

Hole in One! Spoon Feeling happy now, Ostrich Top your tee shot, Rub of the green Gary Player Waggle your hips and swing While heckling your opponent, That's a gimme. Struck by lightning Short irons.

Begin the back nine holes, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Pull out the driver and.... That's a floater. For getting banned from the course. Get thrown off the course.