Golf Ipsum

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Ben Hogan

Taking a practise swing, Swear at the Captain and get banned. Texas Wedge And swing. Hole in One! Act your age and not like a pro. You deserve a mulligan. A scratch golfer, Losing your ball in the rough, Win the Green Jacket At the Clubhouse, Tee off Ben Hogan Hit it as hard as you can Pushed to the right Fluffy lie And getting annoyed.

Chip and run Rub of the green Reading the green, Visit the golf range, Fluffy lie Run down the fairway shouting Struck by lightning A controlled draw Phoenix Jack Nicklaus Mashie Pull out your 3-wood and.... Duck hook! For getting banned from the course. Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Time to buy some new clubs And your caddie gets cross. A controlled draw Tearing up a scorecard And snap your club in half. 3-iron comes out, Out of frustration Pitching Wedge Pushed to the right And shank it. Take a mulligan, Niblick Steady footwork.

Time to buy some new clubs "Get in the hole!" Start your backswing, take it slow. The 19th Hole. And good luck! Act your age and not like a pro. You deserve a mulligan. And snap your club in half. Hit it as hard as you can Better luck next time! Tiger Woods Jigger.

Jigger Open stance Open stance For getting banned from the course. Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Brassie Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Score a bogey Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Duck hook! Get your 5 wood And good luck! Waggle your hips and swing Rub of the green Get a new Sand Iron.

Splash shot Texas Wedge While heckling your opponent, Arnold Palmer Chip in Waggle your hips and swing "Get in the hole!" A gentle fade That's a big slice Jack Nicklaus For packing in golf.