Golf Ipsum

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Win the Green Jacket

Feeling happy now, Using your putter to plumb-bob, Act your age and not like a pro. And snap your club in half. Mashie 3-iron comes out, Ben Hogan Out of anger For packing in golf Pitch and run You got the yips Arnold Palmer Pitching Wedge And good luck! You got the yips.

Pitching Wedge Niblick Duck hook! You got the yips Texas Wedge At Augusta National.

While heckling your opponent, Top your tee shot, Pushed to the right For getting banned from the course. At Augusta National A scratch golfer, Struck by lightning Fluffy lie.

At St. Andrews, Shouting Fore as loud as you can. You need more lessons! Get a new Sand Iron You skied it! Lose your putter, forced to go home. Good break! A scratch golfer, Steady footwork Score a double bogey Walking over the putting green. Better luck next time! Run down the fairway shouting Cleek While drinking beer Score an albatross Better luck next time! Out of frustration Niblick Pulled to the left Open stance Fried egg.

At Augusta National Short irons Weak grip Fluffy lie Spoon Swing quickly, Making a lot of noise While heckling your opponent, Texas Wedge Pushed to the right Run down the fairway shouting Score a double bogey Score a par Cleek Pushed to the right That's a big slice At Augusta National While heckling your opponent, Steady footwork Struck by lightning Carrying your clubs At Augusta National Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Aiming for the groundsman Splash shot 3-iron comes out, Tearing up a scorecard Score a bogey Score a double bogey.