Golf Ipsum

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Long irons

Begin the back nine holes, A controlled draw Struck by lightning Swear at the Captain and get banned. "Get in the hole!" Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Pull out the driver and.... Get a new Sand Iron Fluffy lie Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Fried egg A scratch golfer, Visit the golf range, Pull out your 3-wood and.... Duck hook! Struck by lightning Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, That's a big slice You skied it! Rub of the green And shank it. Fried egg You need more lessons! Top your tee shot, Use your Lob Wedge Completely missed the ball, oops! Splash shot.

Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Good break! Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Phoenix 3-iron comes out, Score a double bogey And getting annoyed.

Open stance Open clubface Get a new Sand Iron That's a big slice Open stance At St. Andrews, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Act your age and not like a pro. At the Clubhouse, Tom Watson Fried egg Splash shot Pull out your 3-wood and.... Condor Ostrich And good luck! Tee off Oops, your ball is in the bunker. At the Clubhouse, Open clubface Long irons.

Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Out of anger Reading the green, Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Steady footwork Texas Wedge To buy a drink for Start your backswing, take it slow. Score a bogey Splash shot Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Out of frustration.

That's a big slice Phoenix Fried egg Pull out your 3-wood and.... Roll around on the ground laughing, "Get in the hole!" Tom Watson Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Thinking your at Sunningdale Duck hook! To distract your opponent Pretend nothing just happened and smile. That's a big hook And swing. Completely missed the ball, oops! Tiger Woods Roll around on the ground laughing, That's a floater. Pulled to the left Struck by lightning At Augusta National Tee off Out of frustration Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Rub of the green Mashie At St. Andrews, You need more lessons!