Golf Ipsum

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Time to buy some new clubs

Score a birdie Score a birdie Duck hook! Hole in One! That's a floater. Open stance 3-iron comes out, Act your age and not like a pro. Act your age and not like a pro. Use your Lob Wedge Fluffy lie.

And getting annoyed Your ball hits the Captain, Completely missed the ball, oops! Tearing up a scorecard Plugged lie in the bunker And lose your mind, Fried egg Chip and run A controlled draw And shank it. Plugged lie in the bunker That's a big hook Tearing up a scorecard Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Rub of the green And shank it. To distract your opponent And good luck! Fluffy lie Looking for a new angle of attack Jigger That's a gimme.

Pretend nothing just happened and smile. A scratch golfer, Pulled to the left Pull out your 3-wood and.... Open stance Fluffy lie Carrying your clubs.

A gentle fade That's a big slice Long irons And swing. You need more lessons! Rub of the green Top your tee shot, Using your putter to plumb-bob, To buy a drink for Roll around on the ground laughing, Tearing up a scorecard Mind where the divot lands! Phil Mickelson While heckling your opponent, Weak grip To buy a drink for You skied it! That's a big hook For packing in golf Win the Green Jacket.

Score a par Tee off A gentle fade At St. Andrews, Pitch and run Get thrown off the course Short irons Score a birdie Duck hook! You need more lessons! Walking over the putting green. Swear at the Captain and get banned. Short irons While heckling your opponent, A controlled draw A scratch golfer, Score a birdie Losing your ball in the rough, Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Top your tee shot.