Golf Ipsum

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You need more lessons!

Score an albatross Ben Hogan Good break! Top your tee shot, Pitch and run Hole in One! Top your tee shot, At St. Andrews, Score a birdie Pitching Wedge Act your age and not like a pro. Score an eagle For packing in golf Condor.

Pull out your 3-wood and.... Jigger For getting banned from the course. Get a new Sand Iron Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Weak grip At the Clubhouse, Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Waggle your hips and swing Ben Hogan Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Pushed to the right Losing your ball in the rough.

Good rhythm Tearing up a scorecard Use your Lob Wedge Open stance Score a par And getting annoyed That's a big slice Good break! To buy a drink for A gentle fade Get your 5 wood.

A scratch golfer, Mashie Pitching Wedge Dancing on the practise ground. Chip in Good rhythm Score an albatross Fluffy lie Time to buy some new clubs And good luck! Begin the front nine holes, Pretend nothing just happened and smile. Get your 5 wood Begin the front nine holes, Tee off Score an eagle.

Weak grip Tom Watson Swing quickly, Pull out the driver and.... Get thrown off the course Ben Hogan Splash shot Texas Wedge To buy a drink for And shank it. You skied it! Shouting Fore as loud as you can. Get your 5 wood Gary Player Condor That's a gimme. Start your backswing, take it slow. Cleek Hole in One!