Golf Ipsum

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And lose your mind

Arnold Palmer Swing quickly, And snap your club in half. Tiger Woods Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Rub of the green Your ball hits the Captain, Tee off Short irons Reading the green, At the Clubhouse, Thinking your at Sunningdale While drinking beer Reading the green, Waggle your hips and swing While drinking beer Use your Lob Wedge Oops, your ball is in the bunker. And getting annoyed And good luck! The 19th Hole. Time to buy some new clubs Jack Nicklaus Duck hook! That's a gimme. Out of frustration Chip in Tee off.

Dancing on the practise ground. You skied it! Aiming for the groundsman Score a double bogey Begin the front nine holes.

Pulled to the left Duck hook! Score an albatross Tom Watson Pulled to the left Score an eagle Ostrich Tearing up a scorecard Texas Wedge Begin the front nine holes, And getting annoyed Score a par Losing your ball in the rough, Get thrown off the course Hit it as hard as you can Take a mulligan, Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Lose your putter, forced to go home. The 19th Hole. While drinking beer Short irons Using your putter to plumb-bob, Your ball hits the Captain, Fried egg Visit the golf range, Your ball hits the Captain.

Rub of the green Thinking your at Sunningdale You need more lessons! Aiming for the groundsman Roll around on the ground laughing, Ben Hogan.

Score a double bogey Fried egg Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, You need more lessons! Get thrown off the course Open clubface Cleek Brassie Splash shot Gary Player Aiming for the groundsman Out of frustration Score a birdie And good luck! That's a floater. And getting annoyed To distract your opponent At the Clubhouse, Short irons Rub of the green Niblick And shank it.