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Golf Ipsum

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Duck hook!

Chip and run Gary Player Get thrown off the course Duck hook! Out of frustration To buy a drink for A gentle fade For packing in golf Plugged lie in the bunker Ostrich Gary Player Start your backswing, take it slow. Dancing on the practise ground. Pushed to the right And swing. Duck hook! Thinking your at Sunningdale.

Struck by lightning Score a birdie Phoenix A scratch golfer, Splash shot Hole in One! Pull out the driver and.... While drinking beer Time to buy some new clubs Taking a practise swing, Splash shot Fried egg At the Clubhouse.

Hit it as hard as you can Score an albatross Carrying your clubs Swing quickly, A gentle fade Take a mulligan, Pushed to the right Jigger That's a big slice To buy a drink for Oops, your ball is in the bunker. Roll around on the ground laughing, Ben Hogan Pitching Wedge Duck hook!

Jack Nicklaus You need more lessons! Weak grip Condor Tearing up a scorecard Top your tee shot, Pull out the driver and.... A gentle fade A controlled draw Swear at the Captain and get banned. Short irons Completely missed the ball, oops! Taking a practise swing, Tearing up a scorecard Score a par Looking for a new angle of attack For packing in golf You skied it! Using your putter to plumb-bob, Phoenix And shank it. Use your Lob Wedge And shank it. Score an albatross Short irons.

At St. Andrews, Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Top your tee shot, And getting annoyed Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Completely missed the ball, oops! And getting annoyed Use your Lob Wedge Lose your putter, forced to go home. Using your putter to plumb-bob, Chip and run.